I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram
My fuck buddy just proposed... Correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't that completely defeat the purpose of FRIENDS with benefits?
Now you can be friends with Insurance Benefits.
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
Randomize
