i wonder how he feels talking to my mother about jesus with a condom on his dick
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
Fortunately for myself I'm twice as smart and half as drunk as everyone else. All things considered I'm leaving here three-to-five times richer than when I arrived.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You kept challenging people to a cartwheel contest...when someone finally agreed, you cartwheeled into some chicks face, then tried to propose to her as an apology. Fyi, she said no
I recommend we watch the Super Bowl together and have celebratory sex if we win. Good news is I don't have a team I dislike so were guaranteed a win.
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
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