Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
I was excited because I thought I didn't have to tell you about the crabs, but surprise! You got em!
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
Whatever, the fact of the matter is that I saved you from poorly planned outdoor sex by doing a rain dance and you should totally thank me.
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class"
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
Randomize
