the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
No matter how drunk I am, I will take the time to wipe a pube off the toilet seat.
i just passed a truck with a bumper sticker saying "i'd rather be cummin than strokin." god bless the midwest.
you were so drunk when the pizza guy got there you told him that you didn't have any money and would trade him the pizza for 3 Porno movies and he totally did it. I may never have to pay for pizza again
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
There was a guy on the elevator dressed as santa in flip-flops giving away beer.
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize
