Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
She only spoke Russian, but she was so gorgeous it didn't matter
Oh. I think she ate all the cake and took our vodka...still gorgeous.
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
I walked into my room last night at 4 am and there's a random dude in his boxers eating oatmeal on my futon. I looked at him and went to bed
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
Randomize
