if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
Somehow his homemade liquor activated memories of my semester abroad three years ago. I ended up yelling random medical advice in German, while my roommates played dress-up with the cat stoned out of their minds. I consequently gave up on dating. Back in the ONS game.
Randomize
