You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
I hate when you've made an ugly girl's day by having sex with her, and then she gets greedy and wants to cuddle after you cum.
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right??????
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
Randomize
