i know we just met, but i forget your name, and i'm wondering why my penis burns?
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
can you explain why there is a dead rabbit in my front seat?
idk, I had a turtle in mine.
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
You were cuddling with an eight iron and I was eating a fajita completely ignoring your presence.
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
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