You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
Hey, I can't find my bed frame. Do you know who took it?
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
Every bar we ever go to has a woman there who hates him. Getting so much vagina has never seemed so not glorious
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
You take a step back sometimes and are like "when was the last time I was sober?" or "wow I need to stop putting everything in my vagina"
Is this an intervention?
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
She shows up drunk at 3am for sex and then punches me straight in the eye in the middle of it because "you're too nice."
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
I got a 93 percent on my last mid term and I was drunk. Think of the possibilities if i were sober for the one thats tommorrow.
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
Randomize
