Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
you thought your tounge was "malfunctioning" because every time u spoke it wouldnt sit still.
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
But you wanna know what the sadest part is? I had to smoke on the way back home cause my mom would be suspicious if I wasn't high after I was supposedly hanging out with you.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
He had me saved in his phone as "Dick Socket". Lets see if I ever fuck him in a bathroom again.
He broke into my apartment to check his Facebook again, the beer is all gone, and there's a new high score on pac man.
I'm about one sudden movement away from being able to cross "throw up in a fortune 100 company's bathroom" off my bucket list.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
just saw a kid get pissed on buy a tiger at the zoo. His dad is rofling and the kid is crying. I think I have to go make a new friend
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
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