you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
Well, now that you have a gf, its gonna be awkward when I get drunk and make out with you..... Then later, pretend like I don't remember.
She seriously spent 30 minutes trying to make balloon animals out of my limp dick...
...
Exactly.
What does puking wasabi feel like?
Like snorting cocaine backwards.
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
He put his name in my phone as David Hot Guy With Tattoos and I fell in love because that's what I was going to change his name to anyways
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
Nah, we’re just sitting around talking about different kinds of boners
Randomize
