dude. I'm so drunk.
pete, this is bryce's mom
I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
pete, this is still bryce's mom
we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
She showed me her prom dress from 2001, which still had her date's cum stain on it.
Oh, so that's why you call her jizzarella....
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
Randomize
