that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
the "happy anniversary" cake for my mom and dad is about to turn into the "yeah, that's a hickey, welcome back from italy" cake.
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, there's a guy walking around the kitchen in a shark onzie, and he just asked if we've ever smoked weed with a shark before. I'm dying
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
They were shocked that I could handle my liquor so well. I'm half Irish and half Russian. This is what I'm made for
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