You were right. It hurts to walk today.
I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
I'm quitting my job and I'm just going to become a professional drunk girls mistake.
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
She was wearing American flag underwear. How could I NOT fuck her?
You're a true patriot.
Excuse you? I'm an asshole at least 90% of the time. Get it right.
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