you drank a bottle of vodka and then while throwing up in my toilet you kept reminding me our hs reunion was in 2 yrs and it was time to start getting thin again anyway
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
Man I gotta stop stashing shit when I'm high. I just spent 2 hours searching for my bag of pot and eventually found it in fucking a bandaid box.
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
Randomize
