Fuck appropriateness.
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
I haven't been this hungover since you found me laying in front of your door gagging with pepto bismal tablets scattered around me
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
i'm surprised you didn't wake up. like i literally came when he was fingering me as i was spooning with you and all you did was mumble "that's a good idea, mom" and pull the sheets away from me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
Jesus Christ. If I were a normal sex-having person, I'd think I was knocked up. I'm cycling through emotions like I'm in a decathlon to crazy.
but seriously, if you see a redhead running down the street tonight in a carrot costume, call 911. He's tripping hard.
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
Randomize