So I ate yogurt with the back of my toothbrush. I feel like I've officially been initiated into college.
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
Just used the leftover candycorn for candycorn vodka. Our house is trying to continue the Halloween spirit for as long as possible.
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
You got me 4 pizzas and i just saw this. I'm too drunk for this shit. I just yelled "4 pizzas holy shit!" At the pizza dude
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
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