370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
Did you pee in the oven last night??
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
Legit just heard the bartender tell some Dude "Penis is not an accepted currency in this establishment" and Dude responded "You take Vagina then?"
Randomize
