wake up i wanna do it froggy style
i may or may not be watching the land before time
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
I'm gonna keep this simple. I threw up in your pillow case. Sorry.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
Mcnellies. I'm drunk enough that you have a window. Capitalize.
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
Just met my future wife. Please dont fuck her.
THIS IS WHAT CELL PHONES ARE FOR! So you can tell me that you're bringing your coworker who lives in the "Halleleuia community" home for a beer SO I'M NOT DRESSED IN LEATHER LINGERIE WHEN HE WALKS IN THE FUCKING DOOR!!
Randomize