Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
im gonna call it quits for tonight... I am so drunk I dont even have the motor skills to masturbate
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
They wouldn't let me go to sleep at the police station while I was waiting to bail u out. YOU OWE ME
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
I slept with someone only because he got my Simon Birch impression. It was a new low.
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
Randomize
