We need to get cat food
Nevermind, the cat will eat lucky charms
I'm eating oreos and watching porn. This is your fault.
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
My ass is underappreciated
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
Randomize
