I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
My motherfucking vibrator ran out of batteries right when I was about to orgasm. It's like he's possessed everything sexual in my life and has compelled it to NOT SATISFY ME.
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
Randomize
