trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
He set two of my ex boyfriends on fire at two different bars without anyone knowing it was him or how it happened either time. He might be a fucking super hero
I mean, they were small fires and no one got hurt, but still. Awesome.
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
Woke up next to my vibrator and a recipe for fudge brownies. If that doesn't scream I NEED TO GET LAID, then I don't know what else could.
Randomize
