If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
I wish there was a tumbleweed emoji. Because that would describe my vagina.
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
My brothers dog was hit by a car and died. They're really sad about it.
But they're having a baby! It's like a dog only 40 billion times worse!
So many questions...the two most important are, where the fuck is my booze and how did you even get the couch through the door?
But then our conversations are like black box recordings. Just the stuff you hear when the plane is going down
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