the bitch is dead man
YOUR DOG DIED?
no i meant my mom has passed out .. so i'll be over soon.
Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
I was to drunk to walk in jimmy john's so I called and got a pickle delivered to me outside the bar , too much?
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
The date did not go well. Turns out I once set her brother on fire.
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
Randomize
