Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
Found her in the closet eating mayo out of the jar with a knife
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
Good thing I left work early to shave my balls because traffic sucked ass, which I was written up for and my reason on the write was "to close on time, have to shave balls for date tonight". Oh yea, that was a bold statement right there
I'm really sorry that I blew your friend in your bed, but to be fair he started it.
When your hungover saltines taste like hope...
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
Randomize
