Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
Gonna get hammered and start online dating men in prison. But... only the ones who get out within two years.
Girl's gotta have her standards.
I'm going to write a book about John. It's going to be called big dreams, little dick
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
giving a 30 min presentation still drunk is like giving birth, upside down in a pit of snakes while being on fire.
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
Rule of thumb; if you ask me if my tits are fake you will not get to touch them.
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
It'll be a pair of asscheeks that light up when they're summoned.
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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