singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
all he gave me for my birthday was sperm
at least its a homemade gift
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
ecstacy + fleshlight = not all that upset about being newly single anymore
Does the room smell any better?
Yeah, i sprayed perfume. It smells like Victoria's Secret, if Victoria's secret was that she was homeless.
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
I'm currently hiding from this horrific thing that we call adulthood. If anyone needs me, I'll be smoking a bowl in the bouncy house.
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
Puked up breakfast after doing my first minze shot in a while, but that shot was to Trump losing the election, so it's all good.
Randomize