But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
I was just at the urinal, started to go, then farted, then said oh yea out loud, then heard someone move in the stall behind me
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
She's sitting on the couch buck naked, eating a cupcake for dinner. I'm breaking new ground as a parent here.
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
The woman at the bus stop told me i smell delicious and asked if i wear cotton then proceeded to tell me about her shellfish allergy
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
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