how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
I need to stop having one night stands with guys in my building so I can have someone to borrow milk from without it being awkward
I really just want to stuff him in my purse, take him home, feed him pudding or applesauce and brush his hair. That's not creepy, right?
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
I love you. We're gonna celebrate your 21st by putting people in duct tape bikinis and pushing them down tequila slip and slides
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fuckin' raining men in my bedroom while I'm trying to drunk eat a rather large portion of pasta. Like shoo I already picked who I'm sleeping with. Pasta wins.
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
Yes, the maid of honor did just deep throat the mic during the toast. How do I follow that?
Randomize