Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
Just heard Miley Cyrus' version of "Every Rose Has Its Thorn". Fuck everything. If you don't have an std you have no right to remake this song
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why was I drunk tweeting incorrect Beyonce lyrics last night?
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
Randomize