You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
Just fell asleep during a bikini wax. Thank god for day drinking.
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
I made him fuck me with my coat zipped up and a unicorn mask on. That level of drunk sex. Weird and creepy yet highly satisfying.
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
Randomize
