Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
Someone left a shot of disaronno in a champagne glass here this morning... flip a coin?
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
Randomize
