and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
Just toasted a glass of brandy with my own reflection to my dimples. Why are you not here?
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
When one is stoned and browsing online dating profiles all men sound like serial killers.
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
My parents just told me that if I stop drinking I could do something great with my life...
They obliviously haven't seen you dance on top of a pool table then
I had to rename my dildo. I met a little kid who named his teddy bear the same name. It just felt wrong.
He carried you out but the best part is you kept saying "can't I keep dancing" as you were gushing blood
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
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