i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for
Oh my god my life; so much cake and so little sex
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
I might have been the first person in 2015 to throw up on a yellow cab before climbing in it.
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
Dicks are not precious.
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
This is the nicest bathroom I've ever been drunk in. The urinal is gold.
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
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