I hate seeing commercials about babies when i'm high
Yeah, I don't like babies at all
pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
It was like a lincoln log. Seriously. I don't know who's more pissed, me or my vagina...worst.hookup.ever.
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
Hey, I told her the bathroom was a "No fly zone" after I used it. She willingly allowed her nose to go through that pain. It's her fault, she only supplied me with vodka when she knows I only drink rum.
So, when I got arrested, they fingerprinted me. I'm getting my nails done right now and I'm pretty sure he's filing off my prints. Worth the $30.
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
So I found out me and this guy I was drinking beer with tonight both got lactated on by the same stripper. We're milk brothers.
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
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