when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
I'm too high and old for this...
One of the finest moments in my life was when I was puking in between my legs as I was shitting, and thought to myself "hmm this shall be called shomiting."
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
Randomize
