Just ran to the store on my way to the office to buy Diet Coke...the guy in front of me let me cut because it was 4 more minutes until 8am, so he wouldn't be able to purchase his vodka. I love Wisconsin
i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
Writing a love song to planned parenthood. what rhymes with "don't have AIDS"
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
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