Don't you send me to vm
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
All these girls I talk to are like I've never had a hangover and I'm like you don't drink right here let me show you
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
I wrote life affirmations on my notes to repeat and read several times a day so I become a better person, see the time on the toilet has been constructive
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
Randomize
