Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
True love is taking a shit with the one you love in the bathroom with you.
i would really appreciate it if you would stop texting my girlfriend.
i would really appreciate it if you would stop cock blocking me.
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
She's just so happy...and so naked.
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
I said we should get a taxi and you were waving down cars, three of which were cops and one of them slowed down and shook his head then kept driving
He didn't think we needed a taxi
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
Is this like a preordered booty call?
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
I booty texted him nothing but three exclamation points at 3:05am and he was in my bed 17 minutes later, lest you think punctuation is not important.
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
Why are you hurting?
Tried to drink all the beer in Nashville last night....failed.
Randomize
