the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
I think im gonna have to stop sexting on the metra. The middle aged businessman behind me just leaned over and whispered 'dirty girl' and highfived his seatmate.
Apparently it costs $70 to clean vomit off the side of our apartment building.
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
The REAL engagement ring is the jeweled butt plug.
Randomize
