What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
tell me why there is a bowl of oatmeal from starbucks in my purse
She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
I just bought a blender and 120 pizza rolls. Bring tequila.
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
So... I sharted on the plane. It was hard to maintain my composure and acted offended at the same time. I hate you for not cutting me off last night.
If you have been drunk at one point during the day and are going to bed sober that same day, something is very wrong.
Randomize
