he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
i cleaned the weed out of my bowl, pretended it was a spoon and ate oatmeal with it. my mom cried
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
I want him to be the Hulk to my Brooke Hogan this Halloween. Can I ask him to be my daddy this weekend?
Only if you say it like that.
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
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