apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
just balanced a champagne glass on my gut. thanks to beer im a living breathing tempur-pedic mattress.
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
I never thought I'd say this, but there is a life threatening amount of rumpleminz in our freezer
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
Well obviously when I get drunk my intelligence level surpasses yours and that's why you can't understand me.
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
At one point I yelled "THIS IS MY PENANCE FOR EVERYTHING I'VE DONE WRONG" and started saying Hail Marys
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize
