that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
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I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
Just took a shot out of a used mini planter. Might die from the pesticides, but didnt want whoever took all of my shotglasses to think they won.
But fine, we can play that game. You can come over and we can have totally platonic, long, boring discussions. Or we can fuck. Whatever.
Well... first you killed the girls goldfish, then you shoved her face in your armpit, made her cry, got kicked out, ate your cigarettes, and passed out in her driveway. Pretty successful night if you ask me
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
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We could make it cute. Like "oh those two cute lesbians who are about five foot two who sell the cocaine down the street. You know the ones? With the Yorkies?"
I thought I was smashed last night but the girl trying to pee in the fridge had me beat. True story.
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
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