So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
this is the second day the intern has gotten me coffee. he either wants to bang me or thinks I'm more important than I am.
either way he's in for disappointment
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
Randomize
