he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
I went from innocently day drinking to waking up handcuffed in jail. Fuck you game days
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs
Drinking Fireball means never having to say you're sorry. Unless its at you're arraignment.
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
Learned two new lessons today: 1) Do not identify pills found in one's car by taking them to see what happens, especially while at work, and 2) There is no logical reason to keep ambien in one's vehicle...
Randomize