he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
No foreplay. Missionary. Too quick. And he owns a fedora.
I almost fell asleep reading that.
I almost fell asleep fucking it.
We moved the bed and she found my vibrator. The entire ride home was a montage of her singing "Are You Lonesome Tonight"
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
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