Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
Please tell me how you drunkenly remembered your social security number when we were checking you into the ER.
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
You force fed me chocolate chips and avocados for 3 hours and kept asking me about my trip to sweden when I was 4.
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
I feel like somebody ate me, then shit me into my bed.
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
Randomize
