I wanna bring you to show and tell
She's like Mona Lisa when she's intoxicated. No one understands her but they all think she's marvelous
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
I'm starting to think my role in the world is to inject batshit crazy, mentally unbalanced chicks with a dose of normal sperm.
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
Call me and get me out of this conversation NOW. My coworker is talking to me about her birds having sex again...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
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