Betty ford says i'm here all night
Oh my god he is having a sentimental moment right now.
He just sent me like a really heartfelt confession of love in which he ended with "make the apt, I'll hold your hand while you get your clit pierced."
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
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